This episode features the continued musical stylings of friend-of-the-show Theme Song Todd.

The fascinating “Press Your Luck” schemer Michael Larson.

A far-less-terrifying cover of “Iron Man” by The Cardigans.

The sitcom kids Paul and Oprah would most like to babysit.

Robin Williams on cocaine. Read that however you like.

A very different nail-clipping experience from your Go To Mom.

Googling “renting kids” was risky.

This episode features the musical stylings of friend-of-the-show Theme Song Todd.

Follow up from our Just The Theme Songs fan.

A healthy use for spite.

Amy’s excitement should really have convinced you to take five minutes and watch the original Prancercise video.

Everything you ever needed to know about Prancercise.

Relinked from episode #5, it’s the Crestbulance ringtone.

Female:

Learn all about the undoubtedly-ripped Sisyphus.

Paul’s face when Amy told him she’d done hot yoga:

This episode features still another listener-submitted theme courtesy of friend-of-the-show Theme Song Todd.

Our Just The Theme Songs fan.

Initial reports indicated the Concordia came closer to the shore so the chief steward could wave to his family.

The Concordia’s captain’s incredibly lame excuse.

And the Concordia’s DJ’s poor playlist selection.

Dance steps like this, except ya know, bloody:

Picture of an awful cruise:

This episode features yet another listener-submitted theme courtesy of friend-of-the-show Theme Song Todd. Amazing!

DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince’s “Parents Just Don’t Understand”.

Dr. Seaver’s incredibly rectangular head:

The uncensored, breast-filled version of Robin Thicke’s “Blurred Lines”.

The boastful balloons, as well as censored naked girl:

The (former) Joe Paterno statue:

Daft Punk’s unavoidable “Get Lucky”.

The full Colbert v. Punk story, as well as the hilarious
Get Lucky sequence starring Henry Kissinger.

Jay-Z raps for six hours straight at the Chelsea Gallery.

Evidence from the Beyoncé Birthers.

Darius Rucker’s cover of “Wagon Wheel”.

The Wikipedia page for Hootie and the Blowfish, with no page for poor Dean Felber.

The as-yet-uncreated Wikipedia pages for Amy Jane and Paul.

This episode features another listener-submitted theme courtesy of friend-of-the-show Theme Song Todd.

Mike Doughty’s current tour, including private on-bus concerts.

Bobby Slayton, “The Pit Bull of Comedy”.

On opting out of the TSA’s nudie cancer scans.

Johnny Depp’s purple gloves, suitable for chocolate-making and pelvic exams:

This episode featured our very first listener-submitted theme courtesy of friend-of-the-show Theme Song Todd.

A notable incongruity in “Parents Just Don’t Understand”.

The location of the three tall towers and one grody frat house at the University of Pennsylvania:

La Bamba doing his vastly superior “In The Year 2000”.

C-SPAN’s coverage of the 2000 Shadow Convention, which was revived in 2012.

Stephen Colbert’s wonky ear (with bonus pointing):

Image via J. Allen.

Since 1996, the ultra-compact Canon ELPH.

The official Twitter account for Freedom Taxi.

The Instagram account for one Jonas Gruber.

Arrivederci, Fior d’Italia, former oldest Italian restaurant in the country!

Ralph’s restaurant history.

Start salivating, footsie people, over Amy Jane’s Podcast Heels:

Photograph courtesy A. Gruber.

The full version of the “Fresh Prince of Bel-Air” theme, including the missing verses required for a logical trip across the continent.

Updated (August 7th, 2013): The Gruber household’s Terrible Pineapple Lumps Rat Problem.

Philadelphia’s own Mayor Michael “Da Nutta” Nutter. And look, Jazzy Jeff is staying busy too!

Startling giant squid facts.

An artist’s rendering of a giant squid taking down a ship:

Painting by Adrian Hatfield. Photograph courtesy P. Kafasis.

The louse that started it all.

A documentary video on Cavity Creeps and Toothopolis.

The possibly-fictitious story of a woman who murdered her boyfriend and served him up to a dinner party.

The spider boat.

The man who turned into a tree.

The Parachute Murder, which really is a terrible way to go.

A video of the terrifying Goblin Shark, along with a bonus link to the Frilled Shark, which doesn’t even look real.

Honestly, look at that little bastard. She’s just living in there, smug and self-satisfied!

Via Twisted Sifter.

The relevant portion of the URL for toilet bowl horror stories:
snake_bites_man_s_penis_from_toilet_bowl_a_brief_history_of_when_rats_snakes.html.

Updated (August 4th, 2013): By popular demand, a Crest Siren texttone and Crestbulance ringtone for your use.

That poor wiener dog.

A litter box bedside table (even worse than an end-table!).

Please use this bag if you are affected by motion sickness or just want a great deal on photo printing:

The Virgin First Class velvet rope.

Writer Katie Heaney gets the fear of flying terrified right out of her.

Just for kicks, a truly bizarre photo of another Asiana flight landing next to the wreckage of Asiana 214, still on the runway. How much would that creep you out?

Mick Jagger is indeed a knight, despite the Queen’s snub.

A picture of the infamous crooked shade:

Photograph courtesy A. Gruber.

A (not quite) bald-headed Harrison Ford movie, coming soon to a theatre near you.

The Rolling Stones’ Officially Authorised Authorized video for Neighbours Neighbors.

Rivers Cuomo’s inter-species loving.

Have your own awkward experience, while trapped on a ship at sea, with The Weezer Cruise.

What does A-Rod smell like?

Dance of the In Living Color Fly Girls.

The infamous Pete Rose Jockey underwear ad:

Via the Los Angeles Times.